Well, let me tell ya somethin’ about these here fancy 24k gold industrial barbells. I ain’t no expert, mind you, but I seen a thing or two in my time. These things, they’re like, well, jewelry for your ear, but not the regular kind.
You know, the ones that go through two holes. Yeah, those. They call ’em industrial, like a factory or somethin’. Sounds tough, don’t it? But some of them are mighty purdy. Especially the gold ones.
Now, I heard tell they got all sorts of sizes. Like, 14 gauge, they say. And the little balls on the end, them’s five or six millimeters, so I hear. Don’t ask me what all that means, but it’s important, I guess, if you want it to fit right. You don’t want it floppin’ around like a loose tooth, do ya?
- Gotta make sure it fits right, that’s what I say.
- And don’t go pokin’ at it all the time. Just leave it be, like a good stew simmerin’ on the stove.
They say you gotta clean it too. With some kinda special spray. Keeps it from gettin’ all gunky, I reckon. Like washin’ dishes, but for your ear. And don’t be twistin’ it around and around! That ain’t gonna do nothin’ but make it sore.
And get this, not everyone can even wear these things. Your ear gotta be the right shape. Somethin’ about them ridges. If your ear ain’t right, well, I guess you’re outta luck. Kinda like tryin’ to fit a square peg in a round hole.
But if you can wear ’em, well, you got all sorts of choices. Plain ones, fancy ones, ones with sparkly things on ’em. Bling, they call it. I don’t know why, but that’s what the young folks say. You can match ’em to your clothes, or whatever you like. Make yourself look all fancy-like.
There’s even places, like, shops, that sell just these barbells. All kinds, from gold to somethin’ called titanium. Heard that’s strong stuff. Guess it’s gotta be, holdin’ up that bar in your ear and all.
Now, I seen some that are curved too. For your eyebrow, they say. Don’t know why anyone would want a bar in their eyebrow, but to each their own. I guess if it makes ya feel good, go for it. Long as it don’t get in the way of seein’ where you’re goin’. Don’t want to be trippin’ over nothin’!
And there’s all sorts of cute ones too. Little flowers, or stars, or whatever. Make you look all pretty and such. I guess it’s like puttin’ a ribbon in your hair, but, you know, in your ear. Or your eyebrow, if you’re one of them eyebrow-piercin’ folks.
So, if you’re thinkin’ about gettin’ one of these industrial barbell things, make sure you do your research. Find out what size you need, how to take care of it, and all that jazz. Don’t just go stickin’ anything in your ear, ya hear? And for goodness sake, make sure it fits! And if you gonna get a gold one, make sure it’s the real deal. 24k gold, they say, is the best. Don’t want none of that fake stuff, rustin’ up and makin’ your ear all green.
And remember, it ain’t just about lookin’ good. It’s about feelin’ good too. So, if you think one of these here fancy barbells will make ya feel good, well, go ahead and get one. Just be smart about it, and don’t go doin’ nothin’ silly.
And that’s about all I know about these gold bar things for your ears. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I got some chores to do.
